| A Horse Thief by Another Name: Remus Rodham | |||
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| Netlore Archive: Email euphemistically summarizes the life and times of 'Remus Rodham,' supposedly the great-great uncle of former First Lady Hillary Clinton and a horse thief and train robber to boot | |||
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Email example contributed by R. Nelson, 2 Nov. 2000:
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Subject: High Profile An amateur genealogical researcher, discovered that Hillary's great-great uncle, Remus Rodham, a fellow lacking in character, was hanged for horse stealing and train robbery in Montana in 1889. The only known photograph of Remus shows him standing on the gallows. On the back of the picture is this inscription: "Remus Rodham; horse thief, sent to Montana Territorial Prison 1885, escaped 1887, robbed the Montana Flyer six times. Caught by Pinkerton detectives, convicted and hanged in 1889." In Hillary's Family History, her staff of professional image consultants, cropped Remus's picture, scanned it in as an enlarged image, and edited with image processing software so that all that's seen is a head shot. The accompanying biographical sketch is as follows: "Remus Rodham was a famous cowboy in the Montana Territory. His business empire grew to include acquisition of valuable equestrian assets and intimate dealings with the Montana railroad. Beginning in 1883, he devoted several years of his life to service at a government facility, finally taking leave to resume his dealings with the railroad. In 1887, he was a key player in a vital investigation run by the renowned Pinkerton Detective Agency. In 1889, Remus passed away during an important civic function held in his honor when the platform upon which he was standing collapsed." |
Comments: This joke had already been around the block umpteen times before Hillary Clinton's name was inserted into the variant transcribed above. For example, we find a shorter, generic version in a 1998 speech given by BYU religion professor Reed Benson:
I'm not like that chap some of you may have heard about who applied for a job and he came to the part on the application blank where it said, "Are your parents still living and if not how did they die?" Unfortunately this chap's father died as a result of a hanging because of a crime he'd committed. Of course the boy wasn't proud of it, but he'd been taught to tell the truth, and yet he was so embarrassed that finally he wrote these words in on the application blank. He said, "My father was attending a public function when the platform on which he was standing collapsed."
As one would expect given that it lampoons the sanitizing of family history, the joke is very popular in genealogical circles. An apolitical 1999 version posted on the Internet features language almost identical to that of the "Remus Rodham" version and probably served as a template for the latter. Another posting offers this amusing alternative to the standard punchline: "Uncle Al occupied a chair of applied electronics at an important government institution. He was attached to his position by the strongest of ties and his death came as a real shock."
Politicians being the most infamous practitioners of verbal deception, it was inevitable certain of them would end up the butt of this joke. In addition to the "Remus Rodham" edition of October 2000 (above), a "Gunther Gore" version appeared later in the same month, only to be superceded by a cleverer "Chadsworth Gore" variant with the added tag line, "And thus passed the very first hanging Chad," an allusion to the Florida voting machine scandal of 2000. It was only a matter of time before we heard precisely the same tale told of a ne'er-do-well by the name of "Chadsworth Bush."
What goes around comes around.
Last updated: 01/08/04
